══ ⋆★⋆ TUXEDO TIMES ⋆★⋆ ══

Week of June 7th, 2026

Rebels are enjoying the summertime buzz, and here at the Tuxedo Times, we’re soaking up more than just the sun – we’ve got the latest RPF updates hot off the presses! Dive in and see what we’ve been up to so far this June!

You can check the latest edition of Tuxedo Times with the .tuxedotimes command!

—◊ Weekly Maxes and Averages ◊—

—◊ Maxes ◊—

AUSIA: 29 (11⇓)
EU: 57 (4⇓)
US: 43 (3⇓)

—◊ Averages ◊—

AUSIA: 28 (9⇓)
EU: 47 (3⇓)
US: 43 (3⇓)
Total: 39 (5⇓)

—◊ Weekly News ◊—

Crowning the Queen!

RPF is buzzing this week as we bestow the 394th Troop of the Week award upon the lovely Colonel, Queenbee2303! Known for her kindness and warm spirit, Bee is a Rebel who makes our community brighter every day. Since joining us in January, she’s been incredibly active across server parties, Tuxedo Times puzzles, Penguin Regiment, and many more shenanigans. This is only one of Bee’s achievements thus far, with many more surely to come!

Double the Scoop

If you thought Rebel Broadcast News was done posting adorable pets last week, you’re in for a surprise! June’s edition of the Pet Column has also arrived, and it’s all about purr-fect cats. Check out the post to meet the fluffiest kitties – Koda, Bert, and Ruby!

After learning about all these sweet companions, dive into a Rebel’s daily grind in the 33rd edition of A Day in the Life! Once Discord closes for the day and real life takes over, reporters are curious about how these members spend their time. Find out more in the post!

—◊ By the Numbers ◊—

How many Rebels were promoted last week?

With a total of 28 new promotions, there were…

1 Major General
1 Brigadier General
2 Majors
2 Captains
1 Specialist
3 Sergeants
6 Corporals
12 Privates

How many smoothies were smashed during our Ausia game tournament?

Of 31 event participants, 17 signed up and submitted scores for the Smoothie Smash tournament. The highest score was 10,380, and in total, the Rebels earned 68,930 points, which averages to 4055 points per participant.

How busy were our Working Rebels this week?

Over the course of the last week, our Members have run the .Work command for Rebel Cash 602 times in #bots. They lost Rebel Cash 211 times, but earned it 391 times!
Additionally, 44 Rebels hold both the Ridge Run and Express roles from the .Workshop, which reduces their .Work cooldown by 2 hours. These Rebels can work again immediately if they lose cash on their first try!

—◊ Tuxedo Comics ◊—

Mamma mia! Or is it Papa pia? This week, Ihasparkelz cooked up a supremely dough-lightful comic by mashing together two classic pizza chef games. Order up!

Papas Pizzeriatron 3000

Kipbip is reporting live from the football stadium and is ready to watch the big game unfold! It seems not all the players got the memo, though…

At least there’s team spirit!

—◊ Challenge of the Week ◊—

For this week’s wordy challenge, Miggywaddles waddled to CPJourney’s Waddl (side challenge: say that 5 times fast) and decided to create one of her own! Click the image below and guess the 5 letter word in 6 guesses or less!

DM Miggywaddles on Discord the solved Waddl puzzle for a prize of 250 Rebel Cash and to progress towards the Blossoming Bookworm role!

Keep in mind, puzzle responses must be submitted before the next issue is released to be valid.

Do you have a comic or puzzle idea you’d like to see in an upcoming issue? Send it in using our Tuxedo Times Suggestion Form and our team just might use your idea!

—◊ Community Spotlight ◊—

“What’s cooking good-looking! It’s Patty and I’m back for another Community Spotlight. This week I am interviewing our Officer Cadet Allegra Adastra about a dish she posted in our #food channel. Grab your forks, let’s dig in.”

Allegra’s delicious looking pizza.

“The dish she made was a pizza, and was requested by her father. She had been doing a lot of cooking and baking on the side, as well as cooking for her family. 2 weeks ago they had a pizza dinner, and was asked to make more pizzas for this dinner!

Next I asked if it was a personal recipe, which it was! Apart from the standard dough recipe found on the flour packet, the sauce is a family recipe born out of experimentation. However for her, her personality shines through in the decoration of the pizzas, and she loves using as much as whatever she has on hand. Look at that work of art!

Finally I asked if there were any favourite recipes Allegra made frequently. She said if she had to pick one, it would be empanadas, which is a recipe that is close to her family.

Thank you so much to Allegra Adastra for this scrumptious interview!”

Thank you for the report, Patty!

—◊ Division Recap ◊—

—◊ Sunday ◊—

»AUSIA«

Max: 29
Avg: 28

Beware the Octobloos, they’re invading the island! The Rebels swarmed the shores of CPJ – Blizzard during Operation Octobloo Lagoon in waves of Octobloos, scaring off any fisher-penguins who valued their safety and ships! Read below for all the terrifying details.
– Mollsr